You’d think that in the midst of the dreaded ‘economic downturn’ than an electrical shop might be all too pleased to sell something to you for £260. I decided earlier this week that it was high time to buy a netbook, and create awesome teaching resources on the move. As it turns out, Comet in Cambridge really aren’t bothered about selling you anything. In fact, they seem a lot happier to simply annoy the customer. To be fair to them, they’re very good at it.

I entered the store at just past four. (Thought I’d make that bit sound poetic). Having looked it up on the Internet earlier, I had an idea of the right price to pay for the ASUS netbook I was after. Unfortunately, they didn’t stock the one which I wanted from the Comet website. I reluctantly decided to pay £25 for an upgraded model on the basis that I could take it home today. Voila, a quick £260 for Comet. You’d think.

I’d been there ten minutes now. It took a little while for a sales assistant to come over – they only pester you when you don’t want to be pestered, due to a bylaw which falls under the remit of Murphy’s law. I went over to the front desk, as instructed, to wait for my netbook to be brought over after paying for it. Having processed the transaction, I was waiting a while. Nothing seemed to be happening. ‘Nothing’ is quite a recognisable phenomenon, but it was foreign to the woman at the till. This woman was a whale of a being with twice the body fat ratio of the marine creature, a chronic moustache, and a breathing pattern which resembled a patient on life support. I asked her how long it was likely to take, and she nonchelantly shrugged her blubbery shoulders. Chain-store customer service for you.

I’d been waiting a while, and it was getting a little silly. ‘Ashwath’ in charge of retrieving the netbook was out the back having a cigarette. In the meantime, moustachey whale-woman mused with a fellow member of staff that a younger member of the team resembled a previous colleague. A few minutes later, in which time I had very much begun to regret my decision to go to a chain-shop which couldn’t give a flying fig about their customers, this Ashwath chap came over, smelling of freshly-smoked cigarettes. I wasn’t particularly high up on anybody’s priority lists.

It transpired, though it took them some time to realise this, that the two models they had in stock were both on display. They weren’t meant to be. In fact, they were each priced with a £20 difference in price tag. I was given two options – accept the ex-display model for a discount, or wait for them to order another in. I didn’t think I’d take my chances with option b, seeing as a customer parting with £260 doesn’t actually motivate them to give you the product. Option a turned out to be a reduction of £17 with a crummy power adaptor thrown in. Not quite enough to pay for something which may have been used an awful lot.

I created option c – a full refund and no further custom, but naturally it took them ten minutes to give me my refund. I thought it might be time for a polite word with the manager. I did in fact keep it very polite, but unfortunately her opinion was that giving me a £17 reduction was akin to charity as it was, and that this standard of service is no big deal.

I’ve learnt my lesson – don’t buy from Comet. Ever. If you’re attempting to buy something for a quarter of a grand, it should at least buy you a little courtesy or customer service. Not in Comet it doesn’t.